Harry Potter and the Orgy of the Phoenix
by LongshotMike
Summary: Harry and Ron discover what goes on behind closed doors. Harry has a change of feelings toward Molly Weasely. Mother, wife, and most important, sexgoddess. Will update often.
1. Jealousy

A flash of unforgivable noise resounded through his head. Pounding, smacking, grunting, moaning…

They were either engaged in a violent brawl or…

"Molly, that's wonderful! Put you're leg up. Yeah, like that. That's great."

"Remus, lift her up…" the voice of Mundungus Fletcher. "Okay, Molly. Are you ready for _me_?"

"Not him, Remus," Mrs. Weasely begged. "I know I agreed, but not Fletcher…"

"Don't be such a spoil-sport, woman…" Kingsley Shacklebolt. "By the way, how does it taste?"

"Mmmmmm…" Mrs. Weasely.

Harry ripped the extendable out of his ear. He looked at Ron. But Ron remained transfixed.

"Are all of them in there?" he said weakly.

Harry nodded. He couldn't believe it. Mrs. Weasely was getting the snot banged out of her. She, who had, up until now, been the image of motherliness in Harry's eyes, was getting screwed by every member of the Order. He didn't know how to feel about it. But his first impression was blind anger.

From behind them there was the sound of a door opening and then very quickly shutting. Soon there were hurried footsteps coming down the hall. Harry and Ron scrambled to hide the extendable ears.

Harry watched over the railing as the mysterious foot-stepper came into view. It was Tonks.

She completely ignored them, and headed straight for the kitchen. Harry saw that she was unbuttoning her blouse along the way.

She spoke a whispered incantation into the door and it swung open, revealing the wild lechery happening just inside.

He was rewarded so suddenly that he wasn't sure if it was real. Mrs. Weasely looked like a cream-puff caught between two grass-hoppers who were franticly bucking to escape. Harry was sure that she would have liked to have said hello to Tonks, but Mrs. Weasely was never one to be rude, and her mouth was full.

The door began to close. "Sorry, I'm late," said Tonks.

"Oh no. You're right on time," Remus grinned.

The last thing Harry saw, before the rapidly-closing door obscured his view, was Tonks ripping off her shirt.

"Harry," said Ron. "I don't feel so good."

Harry turned. Ron's face looked awfully pale.

"It's going to be alright," said Harry. What was he thinking? Of course it wasn't going to be alright. Ron's mum was engaged in a huge orgy, and nothing would ever be the same again.

Some time while Harry had been caught up in his thoughts Ron had vomited over the railing.

"Let's get you to bed, mate," said Harry.

He dropped Ron off on the way to his own room. The experience tonight had given him a lot to think about. He lay on his bed in silent wonder.

Something was growing in him. It clouded all of his thoughts, inch by inch. _It_ was an incredibly huge boner.

He had come to realize what his initial anger at the situation represented. He wasn't bothered so much that Mrs. Weasely had been de-santified. He wasn't really bothered that she was a slut.

What bothered him was that he was under-sexed.

What really bothered him was that he had been excluded.

He could have named the emotion, but he chose not to, for fear of what it implicated about his character. But if he _had _named it, he would have called it _jealousy_.


	2. Harry's Oedipus complex

Ron had gone out early in the morning. He told Harry that he just wanted to be alone. Harry couldn't blame him. If that had been his mother… well if he'd had a mother…

Jesus! Harry had never imagined Mrs. Weasely being the sort to engage in group sex. But after letting the idea stew through the night it was actually semi cock-stiffening.

Harry shuttered. He had just used the words cock-stiffening and Mrs. Weasely in the same sentence.

Since when had he been attracted to Ron and Ginny's mum? Why would he find himself so aroused? Would he have been just as aroused if it had been Hermione or Ginny getting banged by a bunch of aging wizards? He really thought not.

The front door of the burrow suddenly banged open, and who but Mrs. Weasely herself, bustled into the kitchen, carrying a double-arm-load of grocery bags. How could she have woken up and decided to go shopping after the night she must have had?

Harry usually would have hurried over to help, but today he didn't. Instead he watched her carefully, studying her face and figure; her image tumbling over in his mind.

Her face was soft and her cheeks were round. Her figure was under tended, but only mildly so. Her eyes were complex, and yet very kind.

She was a beautiful woman, Harry determined. So he spent the next five minutes staring dreamily at this beautiful woman.

"Harry, what on earth are you looking at, dear?" Mrs. Weasely said. She had an uncertain smile on her face.

"Oh. Er. I'm sorry," said Harry. "I was just thinking," (about the orgy last night.)

"Then why don't you come over here and give me a hand with these groceries," she said.

(And after were done, _maybe_ I can give you a hand with something else…)

"Yes Mum. Er. I mean ma'am," said Harry.

(Sick! You just called her mum. You really are going to hell…)

"Mum is just fine with me," said Mrs. Weasely, glowing at him.

"Okay then; _mum_," said Harry.

Mrs. Weasely stopped. Harry could tell that she was lost for words. He knew that Mrs. Weasely held a special place for him in her heart. To her he was a seventh son. She would have liked nothing more than for Harry to think of her as his surrogate mother. She made a beckoning gesture to him, and Harry went to her.

She pulled him into a warm embrace. But all Harry could think of was rough and wild sex. He realized that their pelvic regions were touching, and against his will, his penis started getting hard yet again.

Fortunately Mrs. Weasely didn't seem to notice. She was leaning in to give him a kiss; a warm motherly sort of a kiss. But Harry's imagination had gotten out of control; what with the orgy and all, so he leaned foreword, kissed her, and before he could stop it, his tongue slid into her mouth. He kissed her the way he had been dreaming of all night.

"Harry!"


End file.
